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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #31  
Old 10-08-2016, 05:17 PM
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Shadow_warrior Shadow_warrior is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by w00f View Post
My understanding of a xiao san too! A FL ccant be catergorised as a xiao san!
true brother, FL/WL is not in these categories. Its just business and no emotion, or at least not suppose to

If you do fall in love with a FL, and she quits and resumes a non WL life then maybe huh? Can be Xiao San?
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  #32  
Old 10-08-2016, 06:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shadow_warrior View Post
true brother, FL/WL is not in these categories. Its just business and no emotion, or at least not suppose to

If you do fall in love with a FL, and she quits and resumes a non WL life then maybe huh? Can be Xiao San?
By definition, regardless a lady whether a fl/wl or not, as long as she is a third person of a married man, she is considered a Xiao san. That is how the word Xiao san come about.
  #33  
Old 10-08-2016, 08:11 PM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Interesting here are some understandings of it

http://www.ibtimes.com/chinese-mistr...iaosan-1422930

http://thinkingchinese.com/xiao-san-...ing-them-small
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  #34  
Old 11-08-2016, 12:09 AM
korean korean is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shadow_warrior View Post

Little 3s 小三 aka mistresses, gfs when you are married
- Will and likely involve money
- She starts off respecting and knowing you have a wife and says she doesn't want to break you up or come in between
- Later she wants more, either money or more of you
- She might tell you to get divorced
- On your side when it was at FB stage, you just thought about your dick, telling yourself its not going to ruin your marriage, you can pull out anytime. When it moves into GF stage, you still think of the sex, but now it lessens, but the commitment and emotions become more.
- When in this stage, your marriage is threatened.
- Its painful to let go, its painful to stay on
Both my little 3 share the same characteristics:
- dont involve money, one of them is rich, another is poor
- they dont want me to divorce, content of being my little three, one of them even wanna break up with me as she doesnt want to ruin my marriage, as she felt I lose too much.
- agree lessens on sex on my part but just happy to have a companion who understand me
  #35  
Old 11-08-2016, 10:40 AM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

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Originally Posted by korean View Post
By definition, regardless a lady whether a fl/wl or not, as long as she is a third person of a married man, she is considered a Xiao san. That is how the word Xiao san come about.
Then your term is too general as you just simply list everyone into as a third party so long as there is another woman with legal binding is involved.
  #36  
Old 11-08-2016, 11:10 AM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

its when the FB becomes 小三 and move into companion stage GF, the sex dwindles, and the issues start

Emotions, money, status these are the things that come up again and again

Think I need a new FB, need to refresh the term FB.
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  #37  
Old 11-08-2016, 11:16 AM
korean korean is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by a2014 View Post
Then your term is too general as you just simply list everyone into as a third party so long as there is another woman with legal binding is involved.
http://baike.baidu.com/item/%E5%B0%8F%E4%B8%89/7035


小三,是通过互联网流行起来的一个词,是对第三者的蔑称。
第三者在中国法律上的含义是指背弃道德三观,凭自己个人喜好,肆意插足他人情感生活,破坏原有夫妻、情侣关 系的人。

It is as simple as that. By definition, no legal binding is needed for such definition
  #38  
Old 11-08-2016, 04:04 PM
Silentreader88 Silentreader88 is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Good info about this term!
  #39  
Old 11-08-2016, 09:05 PM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by korean View Post
http://baike.baidu.com/item/%E5%B0%8F%E4%B8%89/7035


小三,是通过互联网流行起来的一个词,是对第三者的蔑称。
第三者在中国法律上的含义是指背弃道德三观,凭自己个人喜好,肆意插足他人情感生活,破坏原有夫妻、情侣关 系的人。

It is as simple as that. By definition, no legal binding is needed for such definition
This is because the information is being generalized. So long as third party involved this is it. Indeed there is a difference between FB and 小三, no doubt not so distinctly differentiated.

Well I am not here to argue over the terms as different individual perception of things are different depending on the environment he/she is in.

Cheers.
  #40  
Old 12-08-2016, 11:24 PM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by a2014 View Post
This is because the information is being generalized. So long as third party involved this is it. Indeed there is a difference between FB and 小三, no doubt not so distinctly differentiated.

Well I am not here to argue over the terms as different individual perception of things are different depending on the environment he/she is in.

Cheers.
sure bro
  #41  
Old 13-08-2016, 06:28 PM
samdiy samdiy is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shadow_warrior View Post
anyway yesterday met my FB/GF for a while. Havent screwed for 3 months, always got reason period, tired, no mood etc...

damn sianz, FB become GF liao.
Finally coax her to go hotel, end up Pasir Panjang West Coast Fragrance Hotel, counter say no more $40, left $48.

Bo Pian, got chance take loh
Enter room, she take off, now so many years she does her big business don't care anything image or anything already.
So since she already take off, proceed to touch her breasts, she say itchy, don't care just poke lah. didn't even get any foreplay or BJ which I love, so do same old missionary style change a few position, side, on the front
Ask me switch off aircon if not cannot enjoy she say, so I turn off, the more I poke the more sweaty I become. Boring liao
Say change to doggy, wear rubber and whack, finally push her on the bed, and lift her legs and whack till shoot

But after that very sianz feeling, the passion of last time no more, so many month only do once, this cannot that cannot, no bj, really change from the early days of doing 3-4 times a day, one session can whack twice. No more BJ or 69, or fingering etc...all cannot. Fucked up sianz. Really want to try FL/WL but I only into capped BJ for safety. Btw, she used to be one, so knn her customer must all enjoy like fuck till I kenna become her bf.

After doing yesterday wanted second round she keep pretending me and pushing me away, end I go home and PCC

Anyone like me? Started damn hot, fuck like bunnies, but now sianz like shit?

Now its my story. Sigh....
Bro, Sounds like time to terminate the fwb arrangement. Just told on 25+ first time fl do not wait for me when she tried to ask me to bring her to last hotel (2nd time)which was clean and nice.I told her she does not allow capped bj, roaming say itchy both upstairs and downstairs, no frenching,kept watching Tv, no fingering,no 69, no cowgirl,no doggy only missionary, no hj unless pay extra 100, no cunninglingus etc. So I told her NO MORE MEETING UP!!!Met another full time younger prettier slimmer fl 22 yrs old, so happy after doing all of the aforementioned, even hugged me after everything a few times and smiling all the way.Paid $20 more but left a happy man!They have to understand there are many fish in the ocean, willing to provide good service for less ...
  #42  
Old 13-08-2016, 10:18 PM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by korean View Post
sure bro
But the biggest problem is most FB eventually will end up as 小三especially when the feeling kicks in. This is exceptionally true in the case for married man as some woman feel that most good man already attached or married.

No doubt about it in most case all law will just lump this into one, so long as the woman at home cry foul, you will sure end up the looser. At that instant it doesn't matter if she is a FB or she is a 小三 because she is the one outside your married life.

The only difference is 小三 distinctly only refer to those man that are married where as single man can easily call it GF, FB, Lover, etc .... you name it.
  #43  
Old 13-08-2016, 10:22 PM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Quote:
Originally Posted by samdiy View Post
Bro, Sounds like time to terminate the fwb arrangement. Just told on 25+ first time fl do not wait for me when she tried to ask me to bring her to last hotel (2nd time)which was clean and nice.I told her she does not allow capped bj, roaming say itchy both upstairs and downstairs, no frenching,kept watching Tv, no fingering,no 69, no cowgirl,no doggy only missionary, no hj unless pay extra 100, no cunninglingus etc. So I told her NO MORE MEETING UP!!!Met another full time younger prettier slimmer fl 22 yrs old, so happy after doing all of the aforementioned, even hugged me after everything a few times and smiling all the way.Paid $20 more but left a happy man!They have to understand there are many fish in the ocean, willing to provide good service for less ...
It all depends on different people. Some prefer to enjoy it them self and don't want to share (独乐乐), while some prefer variety (众乐乐).
  #44  
Old 14-08-2016, 07:28 PM
predator314 predator314 is offline
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

Would like to share my story here and possibly look for advice from more experienced Bros here.

I'm married with kids, my kids are the love of my life. My love for my wife has dimished since ages ago and our kids only reason we are still holding up. But still, we have respect for each other and I've never had an affair before, even when I was not getting sex from my wife.

But recently, I met up with a friend of a friend over a group dinner, I've met her before and I found her to be very attractive then. But I didn't approached her or contact her for one whole year until the group dinner. We clicked again during the dinner and I found myself attracted to her all over again.

After the dinner, I asked her out alone and we ended up kissing and petting. That was the start of the whole thing, over the course of 2 week, I found myself getting more and more infatuated with her to the extend I have the urge to meet her every moment I have free. I know this is not going to work out because I'll never divorce my wife and make my kids go through single parenthood, but I cannot help myself from thinking about her and I truly feel that I am in love with her.

Any Bros can advise me on what to do?
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  #45  
Old 15-08-2016, 02:54 AM
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....

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Originally Posted by predator314 View Post
Would like to share my story here and possibly look for advice from more experienced Bros here.

I'm married with kids, my kids are the love of my life. My love for my wife has dimished since ages ago and our kids only reason we are still holding up. But still, we have respect for each other and I've never had an affair before, even when I was not getting sex from my wife.

But recently, I met up with a friend of a friend over a group dinner, I've met her before and I found her to be very attractive then. But I didn't approached her or contact her for one whole year until the group dinner. We clicked again during the dinner and I found myself attracted to her all over again.

After the dinner, I asked her out alone and we ended up kissing and petting. That was the start of the whole thing, over the course of 2 week, I found myself getting more and more infatuated with her to the extend I have the urge to meet her every moment I have free. I know this is not going to work out because I'll never divorce my wife and make my kids go through single parenthood, but I cannot help myself from thinking about her and I truly feel that I am in love with her.

Any Bros can advise me on what to do?
There are many variables in your life which you would know more about than any of us here, in order to better asses the pros and cons.

Are you prepared, when you got caught, to live with these outcomes?

a. Hurting your wife, your children, your family, your wife's family, your faith?, your reputation.
b. Losing your children's respect of you (even if you don't divorce your wife)
c. Losing half of your wealth at your age + losing child custody (if you got divorced)

Marriage is a contract solely built in order to protect the well-being of the children (read: including the mother who takes care of them). And in Singapore, regardless of which party who broke the contract, the only outcome is that the man pays.

If somehow, you managed to deal with those outcomes. The next set of problems would arise:

a. Would the woman you had an affair with, see you as a lesser of a man once you lose half of your wealth? Judge her character well enough.

b. Would the woman you had an affair with, accept the social stigma that she would be seen as a home-wrecker?

Say if you got caught, and you both agreed to stay married for the sake of the children. Would you able to live with the fact that you would always be held hostage by your wife for your mistakes?

All I could tell you is that, a scorned woman is an evil entity you don't want to deal with. This could be either your wife or your fling or BOTH.
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