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  #1  
Old 21-10-2018, 06:10 PM
spicydragon spicydragon is offline
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Should I get married before 30?

Currently in a long term relationship of 4 years - now 27. I guess the next step is marriage + kids etc. Especially with pressure from everyone you meet (all uncle + aunties!).

Just wondering if there is any advice/thoughts from people who are married or have been and are older than me cause this isn't something that I can ask my parents or someone I know who has been married etc.

1) Did you regret it or best decision? Would you have dated models and just have fun till 35+? (I previously been in 2 other relationship before)

2) How does your sex life change?

3) Is marriage more of a partnership than it is love? (that's what I've heard)

4) I constantly have a fear of committing - to just one girl? I mean is it really reality that most husbands haven't strayed before? especially there are so many attractive women.

5) girl has a great personality probably 9/10 and looks 7/10 - I always FOMO on the 10/10 girl in terms of looks and maybe 7/10 personality. Is it worth it?

6) What's it like when you are 50 and wife is 50. Do you feel the urge to chase a younger women?

7) So many celebrities like jackie chan, even bruce lee had mistresses. I wonder if this stuff is normal - for places like malaysia etc.

These questions are probably silly and shallow etc, but would be helpful in hearing fellow members experiences and thoughts.
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Old 21-10-2018, 07:01 PM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

So many questions! But i wanna keep it short, i think you perhaps do not know yourself very well, no one can predict what's going to happen in the future, dun even find a fortune teller to tell you about it because it will affect the rest of your life somehow, if the prediction is not good. There is many unknown factors down the road.

1) Did you regret it or best decision? Would you have dated models and just have fun till 35+? (I previously been in 2 other relationship before)

Date girls that suits you and love you. Models is cool but cold in my opinion. They may be pretty but not be the best fuck on bed. But i did had much fun with various girls i picked up when single before i settle down with a lady i love. No regrets to try so many pussy! Of course dun get yourself into unnecessary health problem. Ask yourself, are you ready to settle down?

2) How does your sex life change?

When you hit 35, most likely your libido will decrease, you will be so exhausted with work to pay for a house, you will be exhausted to do housework every weekend, you will be exhausted to be a father of your kids. Likewise your wife too! Sex, is a 2 persons thing, depends how you spice it up.

3) Is marriage more of a partnership than it is love? (that's what I've heard)

There is no right or wrong, is a 2 persons life time commitment. r/s for 4 years doesn't mean knowing each other very well, even old folks like my parents still will have lots of ficition. Is all about give and take.

4) I constantly have a fear of committing - to just one girl? I mean is it really reality that most husbands haven't strayed before? especially there are so many attractive women.

This means you did not stray enough. Keep it that way, dun join the dark side.

5) girl has a great personality probably 9/10 and looks 7/10 - I always FOMO on the 10/10 girl in terms of looks and maybe 7/10 personality. Is it worth it?


????

6) What's it like when you are 50 and wife is 50. Do you feel the urge to chase a younger women?

I let man in 50s to answer. I think also depends on your vigour. Don't think so much before 50, i would be rather interested in my bank account to prep for retirement later. If you got no knowledge for financial, i suggest that is more important than chasing young girls. Old bird experience ok! When you got money the younger women fly to you in abundance.

7) So many celebrities like jackie chan, even bruce lee had mistresses. I wonder if this stuff is normal - for places like malaysia etc.

If you want to eat outside dun get caught by your wife. If you are very rich enough to get a mistress, think twice because this means you got no more feeling for your wife, but always remember what she had scarifice for you. Unless you are a celebrity then nothing to worry!



BUT, that's my opinion only.
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Last edited by unsung80; 21-10-2018 at 08:38 PM.
  #3  
Old 21-10-2018, 08:15 PM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

ts just dont feel you are mature enough to get to marriage now ... maybe you should not think of marriage and just enjoy your single life now ... go and date more girls
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Old 21-10-2018, 08:36 PM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Quote:
Originally Posted by spicydragon View Post
Currently in a long term relationship of 4 years - now 27. I guess the next step is marriage + kids etc. Especially with pressure from everyone you meet (all uncle + aunties!).

It's always a worry when anyone 'guesses' their next step is marriage, almost like shrugging shoulders and saying 'I'm just gonna wing it'

You're getting married because you want to, not for anyone else. Lots of people seem to be getting married for all the wrong reasons.

cause this isn't something that I can ask my parents or someone I know who has been married etc.

Certainly not, and even your best friends aren't the right people to ask. Very rarely do we disagree too strongly with our best friends, simply because on a subconscious level we do not want to risk losing the friendship, especially without the ability to know with certainty that we are correct.

You ask here because we aren't afraid to dish out shit to you, because you aren't our friend.

3) Is marriage more of a partnership than it is love? (that's what I've heard)

Absolutely. The best part of marriage is everything before it Sort of like how researchers have discovered the best part of a holiday is the planning for it, and the orgasm actually comes on the morning of said holiday, because the sky high expectations of how wonderful it will be releases such wonderful chemicals in the brain you think it's just gonna be perfect

But it's not. In fact, for almost everyone, all it can go is .... down.

Because marriage is when the fun ends, and the partnership aka work begins. There's a ton of responsibilities that need to be worked out, especially when kids come along.

Takes a crap ton of communication and accommodation to work through issues that could easily be made up before the burdens of marriage.

Do you think you can tell her you're unsure? If you feel you can't......

4) I constantly have a fear of committing - to just one girl? I mean is it really reality that most husbands haven't strayed before? especially there are so many attractive women.

It is, with very rare exceptions that men are biologically built to want sex. A lot of it. Whether that leads to straying or not is something else.

But your fear of commitment isn't going to go away after you get married. It's just gonna feel like a prison

All studies show different results, but I'd wager that for most men who don't have very fulfilling sex lives with their partners, straying is only limited by the options available to them.

5) girl has a great personality probably 9/10 and looks 7/10 - I always FOMO on the 10/10 girl in terms of looks and maybe 7/10 personality. Is it worth it?

Probably not. See how many rich and powerful men get tripped up, and sometimes professionally ruined by a pretty pussy. Sure they know the risk of getting in bed with that SYT, doesn't mean they can resist it.

Biology makes the human male want to cum in every pussy he can get into, especially the prettier ones. Ensures the survival of his DNA.

6) What's it like when you are 50 and wife is 50. Do you feel the urge to chase a younger women?

I'm not quite close to 50 yet. But yes, it is exciting for an older man to chase a younger woman. Not to mention, frankly it's a lot easier.

7) So many celebrities like jackie chan, even bruce lee had mistresses. I wonder if this stuff is normal - for places like malaysia etc.

Men just want sex, they probably fucked a ton more women than anybody knows.
Of course the boss man himself clearly disapproves of the institution of marriage, but society is built in many ways around it, especially when it comes to kids.

So yeah, unless it is somebody you can see yourself wanting and able to do the shitty work of child rearing with, skip it.

But yeah, as mentioned above, you know yourself best. And whether you can really overcome your worries, or whether you can only pretend that you can.

Come up with an excel spreadsheet comparing the good and the bad of your exes and current. Weight them accordingly, score them.

Especially shared values.
  #5  
Old 22-10-2018, 03:21 AM
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ourworld ourworld is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Quote:
Originally Posted by spicydragon View Post
Currently in a long term relationship of 4 years - now 27. I guess the next step is marriage + kids etc. Especially with pressure from everyone you meet (all uncle + aunties!).

Just wondering if there is any advice/thoughts from people who are married or have been and are older than me cause this isn't something that I can ask my parents or someone I know who has been married etc.

1) Did you regret it or best decision? Would you have dated models and just have fun till 35+? (I previously been in 2 other relationship before)

2) How does your sex life change?

3) Is marriage more of a partnership than it is love? (that's what I've heard)

4) I constantly have a fear of committing - to just one girl? I mean is it really reality that most husbands haven't strayed before? especially there are so many attractive women.

5) girl has a great personality probably 9/10 and looks 7/10 - I always FOMO on the 10/10 girl in terms of looks and maybe 7/10 personality. Is it worth it?

6) What's it like when you are 50 and wife is 50. Do you feel the urge to chase a younger women?

7) So many celebrities like jackie chan, even bruce lee had mistresses. I wonder if this stuff is normal - for places like malaysia etc.

These questions are probably silly and shallow etc, but would be helpful in hearing fellow members experiences and thoughts.

There are always better looking girls apprearing
So what has it gonna do with you ley?
There are always celebrities cheating,,
But what has it gonna do with you ley?
Why are you comparing yourself with them?
You are an ultra hot celebrity yourself?
Or are you an ultra rich and successful individual?
Where ladies out there dare throwing themselves at you??

You are clearly unhappy nor satisfied with your miserable life,,
Don’t get married just to live the life cycle,,
If you can’t imagining waking up beside the same girl for the rest of your life then I suggest you stay away from marriage,,

Marriage is not about having commitment,,
Having Commitment is part of marriage,,
Falling in Love everyday is part of marriage,,
Having responsibility is part of marriage,,
Being there and being the only one is part of marriage,,
Staying faithful is part of marriage,,
Making Sacrifices is part of marriage,,
Having Companionship is part of marriage,,


Marriage is a whole package,,
And this package = creating new lives and building a family,,
Without all the above or even more,,
Your marriage is meaningless,,

If you don’t have the guts to take the up the following challenge,,
Then stay away,, marriage is for grown ups!

From a female perspective,,
Mrs Ow,,
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Old 22-10-2018, 04:00 AM
conquer conquer is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Sound like some questions a teenager would typically ask.

My advice for you is: there is no right or wrong in life, go experience it. Nevertheless life is about journey, not destination.
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Old 22-10-2018, 04:06 AM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Quote:
Originally Posted by CumExplorer View Post
ts just dont feel you are mature enough to get to marriage now ... maybe you should not think of marriage and just enjoy your single life now ... go and date more girls
TS is almost 30 but still feeling lost and insecure like a 15-year-old teenager. At some point, TS should certainly stop being a mommy-boy and go experience life by his own.
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Old 22-10-2018, 05:07 PM
blu3fin blu3fin is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Quote:
Originally Posted by conquer View Post
TS is almost 30 but still feeling lost and insecure like a 15-year-old teenager. At some point, TS should certainly stop being a mommy-boy and go experience life by his own.
Well... then mid life crisis how?
It's natural to have doubts at any age.. life's like that lor
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Old 23-10-2018, 12:08 AM
danilov danilov is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spicydragon View Post
...
1) Did you regret it or best decision? Would you have dated models and just have fun till 35+? (I previously been in 2 other relationship before)

2) How does your sex life change?

3) Is marriage more of a partnership than it is love? (that's what I've heard)

4) I constantly have a fear of committing - to just one girl? I mean is it really reality that most husbands haven't strayed before? especially there are so many attractive women.

5) girl has a great personality probably 9/10 and looks 7/10 - I always FOMO on the 10/10 girl in terms of looks and maybe 7/10 personality. Is it worth it?

6) What's it like when you are 50 and wife is 50. Do you feel the urge to chase a younger women?

7) So many celebrities like jackie chan, even bruce lee had mistresses. I wonder if this stuff is normal - for places like malaysia etc.

These questions are probably silly and shallow etc, but would be helpful in hearing fellow members experiences and thoughts.
Last time girls (and I mean those proper behaviour ones, i.e. wife material) not so easy to bed. Virgin till marriage. So getting married is a way of getting sex on tap, as they say. Of course there is the emotional dimension as well, that is, you really like the company and conversation and have shared values. Not just about sex and physical attraction. For that you can just pay for WL and FL.

Sex life will wane once you have kids to be honest. You may have the energy but if your wife also works, she won't be interested anymore usually. Sleep is more precious. It's also hard to find private time and place.

As you grow older you get hit by double whammy of lowering testosterone made worse by infrequent sex. ED by mid 30 is getting more common.

But you make your life choices and you stick with it.
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Old 23-10-2018, 12:14 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ourworld View Post
...

Marriage is not about having commitment,,
Having Commitment is part of marriage,,
Falling in Love everyday is part of marriage,,
Having responsibility is part of marriage,,
Being there and being the only one is part of marriage,,
Staying faithful is part of marriage,,
Making Sacrifices is part of marriage,,
Having Companionship is part of marriage,,


...
Best summary except the staying faithful part, is open to interpretation

For some guys, it means not having affairs. Paid sex is ok. Guys view affairs i.e. potentially replacing the wife, as more serious offence.

But from what we see in the recent scandals, it seems like wives are more forgiving of affairs??!
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Old 23-10-2018, 02:48 AM
conquer conquer is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

Quote:
Originally Posted by blu3fin View Post
Well... then mid life crisis how?
It's natural to have doubts at any age.. life's like that lor
Yea... some people would feel insecure all the time -- early-life crisis, mid-life crisis, late-life-crisis, etc.

I think the main reason is they just do not know how to live their lives. If you ask them, they probably might tell you, "I see what other people do, other people also ask me to do, then I mah do lor."

These people will always live with thousand question-marks in their heads.
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Old 23-10-2018, 08:08 AM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

I think being single is good. If I were to turn the clock back, I would rather be single.
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Old 23-10-2018, 08:31 AM
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

I think your answered your own questions TS. You have not had many relationships. If you get married now your will forever regret and even think about cheating. At 27 you can still explore your options and find someone you really want to marry without a doubt. Better than settling down and possibly become miserable and mess up both your lives andeven a newborn.
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Old 23-10-2018, 09:38 AM
naan1974 naan1974 is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

People consider many aspect when they think of getting a marriage but somehow everyone seems to forget about the consequences of a divore. Lets be realistic, know your responsibilities and your liabilities as well.
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Old 23-10-2018, 10:06 AM
btblue8 btblue8 is offline
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Re: Should I get married before 30?

I got married at 32, was dating for about 5 years prior, was worried about settling down and losing options. Now at 38, looking back, wish we gotten married earlier to have kids, and enjoy married life. Not sure if opinion will again change in a decade. No hard and fast rules maybe!
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