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  #91  
Old 07-02-2018, 02:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Datingafter35 View Post
I am not depressed but need directions. Used to be but am grateful I get to wake up alive and get to jerk when I need to but will never be able to fuck anymore without some type of NO2 pill or prolactin diffuse pill. Still get perverted when seeing syt. But have to let go because I can't get erection anymore naturally.

I'm turning 40. I want to feel love but feel unqualified because I don't have the means to get a home.

Just random rant. And yes I have heart problem and recently got lump in throat but no pain when swallowed and gp doctor prescribed anti bacteria sucking tablet. But strangely the lump disappear when lying down on my back or flat on my chest.

I have no gf. No house. No car. No proper job. But I have a dream.
  #92  
Old 12-03-2018, 09:03 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

i taken ssri from imh and last time got some Nimetazepam from gp . Nimetazepam can cure my depression like magic , making me happy at the same time. ssri it limits my emotions , i want to seek medical help now. should i go back to imh or look for specialist. when i consult imh doc i dont feel i can disclose my emotions and stories openly. does ssri helps in depression if i take them long enough or they are just bullshit ? i lost 10kg this year , now like skeleton , last time 65kg , now 50kg. im 100% sure im on depression.

1) go holiday totally no feeling
2) girls totally no feeling
3) drinking alone is my only leisure now , last time no drink ,
  #93  
Old 13-03-2018, 04:56 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Nimetazepam is a hypnotic drug which acts immediately so it gives you a high. However the effects are short lived and higher doses are required over time in order to achieve the same effect. In other words it's addictive. It is not a drug that can be used long term. There can also be serious withdrawal symptoms if it has been used for extended periods.

SSRIs on the other hand can be taken long term without being addictive. Many people are on them for years.

SSRIs are effective in treating depression but the effect is not immediate. It can take 2 to 4 weeks, sometimes longer, before the drug starts to work.

If you have been taking an SSRI for some time and you feel it is not working then you need to see a doctor to discuss either increasing the dosage or switching to an alternative SSRI.

There are also alternatives to SSRIs eg Xanax (Bupropion) or the older tricyclic drugs like Dusolepin and Doxepin which can be just as effective but are no longer fashionable because the newer SSRIs purportedly have less side effects.

If you have lost 15kg you should see a doctor immediately it is not normal to lose that much body mass just because you're depressed. Are you eating normally or has your appetite diminished?

Quote:
Originally Posted by cashcow View Post
i taken ssri from imh and last time got some Nimetazepam from gp . Nimetazepam can cure my depression like magic , making me happy at the same time. ssri it limits my emotions , i want to seek medical help now. should i go back to imh or look for specialist. when i consult imh doc i dont feel i can disclose my emotions and stories openly. does ssri helps in depression if i take them long enough or they are just bullshit ? i lost 10kg this year , now like skeleton , last time 65kg , now 50kg. im 100% sure im on depression.

1) go holiday totally no feeling
2) girls totally no feeling
3) drinking alone is my only leisure now , last time no drink ,
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  #94  
Old 29-04-2018, 07:32 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

New
https://news.tfionline.com/post/1733...orld-3-secrets

How To Be Happy In Today’s Crazy World: 3 Secrets From Research
Eric Barker, Barking Up The Wrong Tree, April 24th, 2018.

Sometimes it feels like the world is actively conspiring against your happiness. There are a record number of people on antidepressants. Enough people in Western nations consume–and then excrete–the medications that they’re at detectable levels in the water supply.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

Some one in five U.S. adults is taking at least one drug for a psychiatric problem; nearly one in four middle-aged women in the United States is taking antidepressants at any given time… You can’t escape it: when scientists test the water supply of Western countries, they always find it is laced with antidepressants, because so many of us are taking them and excreting them that they simply can’t be filtered out of the water we drink every day.

For the past few decades we’ve lived under the idea that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in your noggin. And while that is true for some people, more and more research is showing that our dissatisfaction may be due less to a broken brain and more to a broken life.

You don’t see so rapid a surge in cases of depression because our genetics or grey matter changed overnight. The world has shifted in ways that are detrimental to the psychological needs of the human animal. That persistent feeling of vague dissatisfaction may be a normal response to abnormal circumstances. The canary in the coal mine.

So journalist Johann Hari spent three years on a journey of over forty thousand miles conducting more than 200 interviews with social scientists and psychologists to discover what was wrong with the way we live today that was causing such an explosion of unhappiness.

His excellent book is Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions.

What he found was that while our world has become very technologically connected, all the sources of unhappiness stem from a growing disconnection in other areas of our lives.

Disconnection From Other People: Loneliness is the equivalent of being punched in the face. I mean, literally.

Your stress response to both–the increase in your body’s cortisol level–is the same.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

Feeling lonely, it turned out, caused your cortisol levels to absolutely soar–as much as some of the most disturbing things that can ever happen to you. Becoming acutely lonely, the experiment found, was as stressful as experiencing a physical attack. It’s worth repeating. Being deeply lonely seemed to cause as much stress as being punched by a stranger.

And have no illusions, loneliness is an epidemic in the modern world. A few decades ago, the average US citizen reported having three close friends. Since 2004 the most common answer is… Zero.

I can already hear some people crowing: “I might be dissatisfied but how could it be due to loneliness? I’m always around people.”

Turns out there’s a difference between being lonely and feeling lonely. This is why someone who works a job surrounded by people and then goes home to a spouse and children, can spend very little time alone–and yet still feel profoundly lonely.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

In his studies, it turned out that feeling lonely was different from simply being alone. Surprisingly, the sensation of loneliness didn’t have much to do with how many people you spoke to every day, or every week. Some of the people in his study who felt most lonely actually talked to lots of people every day. “There’s a relatively low correlation between the objective connections and perceived connections,” he says.

So what do we need to do? To prevent feeling lonely, we must share something with those around us–something meaningful to both you and them. A belief. A cause. An activity. A goal. We need to be “in it together”–not merely together in the middle of a faceless crowd.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

As he researched this, John discovered that there was a missing ingredient to loneliness, and to recovering from it. To end loneliness, you need other people–plus something else. You also need, he explained to me, to feel you are sharing something with the other person, or the group, that is meaningful to both of you. You have to be in it together–and “it” can be anything that you both think has meaning and value.

So join a group. Harvard researcher Robert Putnam has studied group activities for decades–everything from bowling leagues to volunteer groups.

Between 1985 and 1994 involvement in community organizations declined by 45%.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

Today, people still bowl, but they do it alone. They’re in their own lane, doing their own thing. The collective structure has collapsed. Think about everything else we do to come together–like supporting your kid’s school, say. “In the ten short years between 1985 and 1994” alone, he wrote, “active involvement in community organizations … fell by 45 percent.”

Famed biologist E.O. Wilson once said, “People must belong to a tribe.” Increasingly, we don’t.

Disconnection From Values: Your pursue “intrinsic values” when you do something solely because you love it. You pursue “extrinsic values” when you chase money or status. Being a patriotic soldier is intrinsic; being a mercenary is extrinsic.

The lesson from the research is clear: the more extrinsically motivated you are, the more you feel motivated by money or status, the more depressed and anxious you are.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

Twenty-two different studies have, in the years since, found that the more materialistic and extrinsically motivated you become, the more depressed you will be. Twelve different studies found that the more materialistic and extrinsically motivated you become, the more anxious you will be. Similar studies, inspired by Tim’s work and using similar techniques, have now been carried out in Britain, Denmark, Germany, India, South Korea, Russia, Romania, Australia, and Canada–and the results, all over the world, keep coming back the same.

I know some people are jumping to say, “Well, I’m not like that!” But, to a degree, we have all become more extrinsically motivated. We all care, to some degree, what others think of us and technology often amplifies this to toxic levels. Facebook and Instagram have become gladiatorial status tournaments to show off how cool our lives are.

But when we’re counting “likes” on social media, we let others control our self-esteem. And that places your own happiness outside your control. Not good.

And even if you win, you lose. Studies show that the achievement of extrinsic goals–the fancy car and the impressive promotion–bring no lasting happiness. None. Meanwhile, when we pursue intrinsic goals like being a better parent or trying to improve our writing skills so our blog posts don’t suck, we feel much happier and less anxious.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

People who achieved their extrinsic goals didn’t experience any increase in day-to-day happiness–none. They spent a huge amount of energy chasing these goals, but when they fulfilled them, they felt the same as they had at the start…. But people who achieved their intrinsic goals did become significantly happier, and less depressed and anxious. You could track the movement. As they worked at it and felt they became (for example) a better friend–not because they wanted anything out of it but because they felt it was a good thing to do–they became more satisfied with life.

You experience “flow” when you’re so involved in something that you lose track of time. You know the old saying: “time flies when you’re having fun.” Flow is a huge contributor to happiness.

And the more focused we are on extrinsic goals like status, the fewer flow states we experience.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

But when Tim studied highly materialistic people, he discovered they experience significantly fewer flow states than the rest of us. Why would that be? He seems to have found an explanation. Imagine if, when Tim was playing the piano every day, he kept thinking: Am I the best piano player in Illinois? Are people going to applaud this performance? Am I going to get paid for this? How much?

So what should we do? Yeah, we all have to pay the bills and achieving a decent level of status is a good thing, but we need to start choosing more activities that serve those intrinsic values.

Spending more time with those we love rather than those who can help us get ahead. More time playing the guitar because it’s fun rather than sharpening our Excel skills to get that promotion.

Spend a little more time with people that make you smile and doing the things that make you smile–simply because they make you smile.

So you’re connecting with people and connecting with your intrinsic values. Great. What’s another connection we’re getting less and less of?

Disconnection From Nature: All other things being equal, move closer to nature and you’ll be happier. Move away from nature and you’ll be more depressed.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

…the people who moved to green areas saw a big reduction in depression, and the people who moved away from green areas saw a big increase in depression.

Some might say that’s because rural areas have less crime or less pollution or… Wrong.

If you live in the part of a big city with lots of trees, you get happier. Cart yourself over to the section of the city that’s nothing but concrete and you get sadder.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

They compared deprived inner-city areas that had some green space to very similar deprived inner-city areas without green space. Everything else–like levels of social connections–was the same. But it turned out there was less stress and despair in the greener neighborhood.

We simply weren’t meant to spend all our time going from cubicle to couch. Feeling happier can be as simple as spending more time in nature.

The research all says that exercise makes us happier. Guess what? When you exercise outdoors the effect is even stronger.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

When scientists have compared people who run on treadmills in the gym with people who run in nature, they found that both see a reduction in depression–but it’s higher for the people who run in nature.

So what happens when you make a consistent, concerted effort to be happier?

You fail miserably. No joke. Deliberate efforts to be happier do not work… in the US and UK, that is.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

They tracked thousands of people, some of whom had decided to deliberately pursue happiness and some of whom hadn’t. When they compared the results, they found something they had not expected. If you deliberately try to become happy, you will not become happier–if you live in the United States. But if you live in Russia, Japan, or Taiwan, you will become happier.

What’s going on? It’s not that happiness is unachievable or that hard work isn’t rewarded. The issue here is that the US and UK have the most individualistic cultures. And so the efforts people in those countries make are usually individualistic…

But happiness comes from our connections to other people.

And so when we work toward just making ourselves happy as individuals we often fail. But when we work towards the happiness of a group, we usually succeed.

From Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression–and the Unexpected Solutions:

“The more you think happiness is a social thing, the better off you are,” Brett explained to me, summarizing her findings and reams of other social science.

The modern world promotes a culture of “be yourself.” But if you want to be happy, that isn’t always the best idea.

To find more joy, spend a little less time being you and little more time being us.
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  #95  
Old 04-05-2018, 12:19 AM
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Talking Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Greetings,

In the morning, take 500mg of L-tyrosine and before bedtime take 100mg of 5htp! These supplements will increase serotonin level to minimize depression!
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  #96  
Old 06-05-2018, 08:52 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Reading

If I may ask what has nuscleman done to cause you so much anger that at every opp6you have you will post all his personal information?

Are you his victim of any sort?
  #97  
Old 07-05-2018, 05:38 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Quote:
Originally Posted by BTech View Post
Reading

If I may ask what has nuscleman done to cause you so much anger that at every opp6you have you will post all his personal information?

Are you his victim of any sort?
Where is this occurring? Please provide link.
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  #98  
Old 12-05-2018, 10:26 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Simply get a hobby or 2!Get another degree n settle for nothing.. Let ya mind stretch n explore..just do it n do not procrastinate! U will feel better.. Cheers!
  #99  
Old 04-06-2018, 11:12 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

I do have issues but not sure to share it here or not. Damn pai seh.
  #100  
Old 04-06-2018, 01:05 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

It's an anonymous forum man. Pour it all out.
  #101  
Old 04-06-2018, 05:47 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

Quote:
Originally Posted by camoman View Post
I do have issues but not sure to share it here or not. Damn pai seh.
Nobody knows who you are and anonymity has always been the hallmark of this forum.

I cannot think of a better place to share your experiences.
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  #102  
Old 06-06-2018, 01:07 AM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

*disclaimer: i am not here to bash professional help, these were my own experiences and should be view as is.

I wouldn't go into details of what/who/why, but I was diagnosed with dysthymia at 16. While being in a constant state of sadness, nothing felt good, you eventually retract into your own well of bleakness. At the peak of my depression, i couldn't see colors.

Mental Health awareness/support/treatment is sadly lacking in Singapore.

Here were some of my experiences from age 16 - 21.

(AWARENESS) My condition was often dismissed by my parents and peers. It was because it is so common to hear people say "oh man I'm depressed, wah damn depressed sia etc" that it became marginalized. It was so frustrating to try to communicate with people on your state of mind, when the moment they hear the word "depressed", they are filled with skepticism. This was made worst during my army daze.

(SUPPORT) The only support I had was my Psychologist(s) at IMH, who was more of a observer rather than a friend. We would go through memories to find out why/what/who, and just endless barrage of questions over and over again to find the root cause. At one point, i remembered telling her "what if i was born this way". Beyond that, there's absolutely no one i could talk to. I had hoped that i would be given an answer by the experts and be on my merry way.

However, depression is not that simple.

The psychologist assigned to eventually went to the private sector and i had to start all over again with the new one - which of course i didn't go for because it felt really pointless.

(TREATMENT) The doctors started me on SSRIs and it destroyed me. I was robbed my personality, difficulty in sleepy became insomnia, and i couldn't even get an erection. Every day i was on SSRIs, the day would just past idly by, while i was practically locked away inside my own body. I was taken off the meds after two agonizing month, I was eventually switched to another type of SSRIs, which did not work as well. Ultimately i decided to stop seeking subsidized professional help as it was draining me more than it was helping - also good help didn't come cheap and i did not want to burden my parents with that.

-closing-

Being older now and able to afford better treatments, all i can say is that you really do get what you paid for. While my life is significantly better now, my journey with dysthymia has not ended. Over the years, I've learnt to cope with the struggles, leading a relatively normal and happy life.

Like a table, we need four pillars of strength to be stable, i urge anyone suffering from this illness to find their pillars.

For me, it is family,friends,fishing,420.

Trust me when i say that the human spirit is stronger than anything, and will only get stronger each day. Believe that depression is not the end, and the only true way to beat this is to stand firm.

-rant over.
  #103  
Old 08-06-2018, 12:44 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

also don't know where to start.

First of all I have no job now. So why not find one? Find job also need money to travel and tahan for a month. I don't have those. So I'm lost as to how to start. In fact right now I'm surviving on 1 meal a day. Mostly instant noodles and an egg.

I don't even have the money to replace my broken spectacles. Have to use scotch tape to tape the side together and it keeps wobbling up and down.

To make things worse I have thyroid problems that causes slightly blurry vision and sweating. I cant continue with my treatment anymore because I'm broke.

All these things put together is driving me to the point of no return. In fact my back is so far up against the wall I just feel like ending everything. I think really no way out anymore. Even someone successful like Kate spade can kill herself what about lesser mortals like me?

Its the only thing I think about nowadays. Any advice or help would be appreciated.
  #104  
Old 08-06-2018, 06:49 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

bro well at least you can share here and u know u are not alone here.

but if u want more advice, it will help if we know more about you. i assume u have a hyper thyroid condition, but that should not be the cause of you being in your current state. i have a few friends who have this condition too.

maybe it will help if u can reveal more...e.g your background and experience, your education level etc. how u end up in this state? what type of job are u in before and looking at ? and why cant u go look for one online etc...

i have seen samsters asking for help and money here and was supported by some good soul here..... so maybe you could also find some help here too if u let us know more about yourself.




Quote:
Originally Posted by camoman View Post
also don't know where to start.

First of all I have no job now. So why not find one? Find job also need money to travel and tahan for a month. I don't have those. So I'm lost as to how to start. In fact right now I'm surviving on 1 meal a day. Mostly instant noodles and an egg.

I don't even have the money to replace my broken spectacles. Have to use scotch tape to tape the side together and it keeps wobbling up and down.

To make things worse I have thyroid problems that causes slightly blurry vision and sweating. I cant continue with my treatment anymore because I'm broke.

All these things put together is driving me to the point of no return. In fact my back is so far up against the wall I just feel like ending everything. I think really no way out anymore. Even someone successful like Kate spade can kill herself what about lesser mortals like me?

Its the only thing I think about nowadays. Any advice or help would be appreciated.
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Old 08-06-2018, 09:22 PM
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Re: Help with Depression and Self Esteem issues

try go to https://www.sos.org.sg/ for help
u need to see a psychiatrist asap

Quote:
Originally Posted by camoman View Post

All these things put together is driving me to the point of no return. In fact my back is so far up against the wall I just feel like ending everything. I think really no way out anymore. Even someone successful like Kate spade can kill herself what about lesser mortals like me?

Its the only thing I think about nowadays. Any advice or help would be appreciated.
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