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  #1  
Old 22-02-2014, 04:52 PM
cultivate cultivate is offline
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Sexless marriage

Hi Bro,

It is embarrassing to tell others my story but this is bothering my life now, in fact my whole life. I would like to have some advise or views from others. I can't tell my friends or family so I am feeling miserable.

My wife and I had been married for 3 plus years and didn't have a baby.
Family and friends has been asking do we have any planning yet and i will just came out with some excuses like "we plan not to have baby"

But the truth is , we don't even have sex for 3 years plus or i should say only one time but not a complete sex.

People must be thinking why?
I would say I am a normal guy with a normal sex drive. I always feel like having sex maybe 2 or 3 times per week. So since i do not have the luck to have sex with my wife, I can only DIY. Ocassionaly i have no choice and i must admit i do have to find some other holes outside.

Why am i doing this? Seriously if i can have a normal sex life, i will not have to think of finding outside.

this has been going on for 3 years, i seriously need to think about this issue. I find that this is not healthy and i feel terrible. I tried, I am trying very hard now. I talked to her about this but she will always say until like there is no problem. "We can have sex, it's not that I didn't give you, but I am a girl, i will not initiate to have sex with you" She said. This statement doesn't sound wrong at all.

But the truth is, I tried to touch her, hug her...and her bed is surrounded with papers, computers, TV on...her mind is surrounded with tasks. Sex is never on her mind and she admits that she has no urge at all and she challenge me to ask other girls if they have urge.

I tried to hug her, kiss her, tried to touch her breast but she will hit me and say dun molest her. How? how do i continue when she said all these and all my urge also dies off.

I hope that i can have a healthy sex life now and even after giving birth. What i am going to do now is to continue to seduce her to have sex. But I really dun noe what i should do if all these fails. I have searched the internet for a divorce procedure in Singapore.

What is your advise? Do you think if you are going to have a sexless marriage, will you have a divorce and look for another marriage?
  #2  
Old 23-02-2014, 08:23 AM
zeajay zeajay is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Let her go. It's either you married a nun or her sex sessions are satisfied by others.
  #3  
Old 23-02-2014, 08:27 AM
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Re: Sexless marriage

Ts,when the last u have sex with her.
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  #4  
Old 23-02-2014, 09:05 AM
mcyeoh mcyeoh is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Quote:
Originally Posted by cultivate View Post
Hi Bro,

It is embarrassing to tell others my story but this is bothering my life now, in fact my whole life. I would like to have some advise or views from others. I can't tell my friends or family so I am feeling miserable.

My wife and I had been married for 3 plus years and didn't have a baby.
Family and friends has been asking do we have any planning yet and i will just came out with some excuses like "we plan not to have baby"

But the truth is , we don't even have sex for 3 years plus or i should say only one time but not a complete sex.

People must be thinking why?
I would say I am a normal guy with a normal sex drive. I always feel like having sex maybe 2 or 3 times per week. So since i do not have the luck to have sex with my wife, I can only DIY. Ocassionaly i have no choice and i must admit i do have to find some other holes outside.

Why am i doing this? Seriously if i can have a normal sex life, i will not have to think of finding outside.

this has been going on for 3 years, i seriously need to think about this issue. I find that this is not healthy and i feel terrible. I tried, I am trying very hard now. I talked to her about this but she will always say until like there is no problem. "We can have sex, it's not that I didn't give you, but I am a girl, i will not initiate to have sex with you" She said. This statement doesn't sound wrong at all.

But the truth is, I tried to touch her, hug her...and her bed is surrounded with papers, computers, TV on...her mind is surrounded with tasks. Sex is never on her mind and she admits that she has no urge at all and she challenge me to ask other girls if they have urge.

I tried to hug her, kiss her, tried to touch her breast but she will hit me and say dun molest her. How? how do i continue when she said all these and all my urge also dies off.

I hope that i can have a healthy sex life now and even after giving birth. What i am going to do now is to continue to seduce her to have sex. But I really dun noe what i should do if all these fails. I have searched the internet for a divorce procedure in Singapore.

What is your advise? Do you think if you are going to have a sexless marriage, will you have a divorce and look for another marriage?
it seems like she may have a sight and heart on another things and that will be sad.......
  #5  
Old 23-02-2014, 10:05 AM
billy_bonker billy_bonker is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

been there. done that. get out of it before it's too late.
  #6  
Old 23-02-2014, 10:11 AM
Lindblum Lindblum is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

looks like its time to work out, get in shape, and change your clothes including home wear to look more attractive. You can't wear a singlet and have a pot belly and expect your wife to feel sexually attracted to you. Forget the notion "She's my wife, she should be having sex with me whether or not I look like crap." This is the 21st Century, people have freedom of choosing their spouses and when they want to get intimate. Work on it dude
  #7  
Old 23-02-2014, 10:31 AM
happiee happiee is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

TS think your wife is workaholic and sympathy you. guess TS need to find out the actual reason behind, work might be just an excuse for many people...good luck cheer up
  #8  
Old 23-02-2014, 10:44 AM
fictionman fictionman is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Sex is a major part of a happy marriage...If u r not getting ANY SEX fm ur wife, the marriage im sad to say is not complete...Either u guys really really sit down & talk abt this, then ur marriage wont last...Sorry bro...Either u suck it up & continue to DIY & eat outside (like me) or end the marriage...You wont be happy bro...But i really hope you guys work it out & be happy for the rest of ur life
  #9  
Old 23-02-2014, 10:56 AM
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Get1Cow Get1Cow is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Kinda sad if the wife doesn't fulfill her duty at such an early marriage.

Too career minded or cant be bother of her husband feeling? Must ask her why bother to marry at first

TS got test drive her before marrying her? Real man wont want such type of material to be a wife



I would say don't keep quiet.

If she still wont repent or reflect upon herself, slowly make both side of the families aware of your situation, they will sympathise you on valid reasons.
If the situation still doesn't improve.... short pain is better than long one...you know what to do with the marriage
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Last edited by Get1Cow; 23-02-2014 at 11:08 AM.
  #10  
Old 23-02-2014, 11:09 AM
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InnerCircle InnerCircle is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

TS bro, I salute you for sharing your sexless marriage.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cultivate View Post
"We can have sex, it's not that I didn't give you, but I am a girl, i will not initiate to have sex with you" She said. This statement doesn't sound wrong at all.

But the truth is, I tried to touch her, hug her...and her bed is surrounded with papers, computers, TV on...her mind is surrounded with tasks. Sex is never on her mind and she admits that she has no urge at all and she challenge me to ask other girls if they have urge.

I tried to hug her, kiss her, tried to touch her breast but she will hit me and say dun molest her. How? how do i continue when she said all these and all my urge also dies off.

What is your advise? Do you think if you are going to have a sexless marriage, will you have a divorce and look for another marriage?
May I know the age of your wife? For all I know, most ladies in their mid-late 20s and 30s should have urges as well. I could be wrong and your wife could be different..

I agree with the other bros, try to find out what the actual reason is..

If it's physical attraction, then you might want to try toning and dressing up.

But if it's because she has her heart set on someone else then this is going to be a uphill battle..

Take heart bro and all the best!
  #11  
Old 23-02-2014, 11:16 AM
tallsynn tallsynn is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Hmm.. Ts, do u fuck her before marriage?
How about using some Spanish Fly? To get her in the mood.
  #12  
Old 23-02-2014, 11:49 AM
jazp jazp is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

bro, why don't you try another bro's method? no offense.. just a suggestion.. try to use alittle more force to force yourself on her once..

there can only be two possibilities:

1) probably she haven't found the pleasure of having sex yet so if you force yourself on her, she may end up liking to be fucked by you cos you showed her you're her man and you're in control. happy ending.

2) if she forcefully retaliate and ends up slapping you or crying out loud saying "no! sob sob sob".. you know that this is not a marriage you want..

what do other bros think?
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  #13  
Old 23-02-2014, 12:00 PM
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Allanooi Allanooi is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

Maybe ur wife is having an affair with her ex bf who also married before u married her .... How low the sex drive can it be? Why dun u hire PI to trail her ...
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  #14  
Old 23-02-2014, 12:06 PM
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Re: Sexless marriage

Sad to say, you have been bullied by your wife. Not too late to leave her now at least there is no children involved yet.
  #15  
Old 23-02-2014, 12:24 PM
Sirrus Sirrus is offline
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Re: Sexless marriage

just break up lar, not compatible....if she like u she will want to fuck your brains out. if she no such urge than she is not a complete stable mental stage
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